reflections

call it middle age, or just the stresses of the news(oil spills,joblessness) or at home, with business a little too quiet, or friends getting ill,hurt. i lately find myself sad, wondering how i spent so much of my child hood not waiting till i was a grown up, and now at times i feel old and appalled that my life is (if god blesses me with a full life) half over.sometimes i long to be a child again listening more than i did to the wisdoms of my dad, or the young mother with my arm load of babies(so far the most fullfilling time in my life),just wondering when did looking forward turn into looking back. God help me to just look to now and what is. but sometimes life is just scary.

the fall to christmas review

just a few tidbits in the fall i battled hin1 by vaccinting over 200 kids at my school. i went away with my hard core girls to sea isle and it was just the best. these estrogen infusion weekends i just live for. i went scrapping in amish country. went to see mama mia with my church and my theater buff morgan and friend went with me . guy got his lisense.i also have lots of girls at my house as the older 4 are dating. the current girls are lovely they all get along and it is so much fun having them around. they get excited about family things like tree decoarating. i can only hope and pray that this is a foreshadowing of good things to come.

the best stuff

i am not even sure where to begin. we had the most amazing experience in May with the marriage of my neice megan to her new husband thomas. it was such a joyful day(i took 400 pictures!) but the family reunion was  a reawakening of old relationships. we got to see cousins that i had not seen since i was a child   and the connections were still there! we are planning a reunion in 2011. this whole thing just reaffirmed what i already know. i am sssoo blessed. i love my family. then in july we took our trip of a life time with the kids...our cruise. all went but justin who was touring with his band on warp tour. we swam with dolphins, saw Bermuda snorkeled, mopeded, jet skis, rock climbed, ice skated, ate VERY well. and guess what?..i still love my husband. it was like a honeymoon for us..after that camp hill scrapping with the ladies from the message board and one other sassy scrapper.I broke a personal record in pages done. apparently when you are not talking so much you get more done, but with less witnesses i shopped more. bad.now i am at warwick camp for i think my 8th year?now i miss my family. guy robert met a girl on the cruise and after a year of mourning his old girlfriend is finally happy and glowing again. Justin also ended things with jewlia and met another girl dulcie who just connected with all of us so he is glowing..tyler dates an awesome girl rachel who i love. It is so nice having girls around. on big guys birthday they all baked!!

i am one year out on my cancer surgery and coming on one year since radiation..

life is good.

next in the summer adventure...garage sale...

oh did i mention austin graduatedfrom east amwell and justin did warp tour with kelsey and the chaos...

so a few things along the way...i discovered facebook which has made me be a bad blogger. not sure anyone reads this but if anything it helps me when i go back to scrapbooking or writng the annual christmas letter. so the pictures...the bear is from the charity crop i ran for pediatric cancer research, ride for erik a foundation my friend started,the picture of number 4 son austin rock climbing made it into nj monthly! i got a photo credit!(okay so i am totally best friends with the art editor but still)then there is the whole twins getting their pemits can i just say yikes. little guy  driving, he says driving with dad and i together is pure hell. nice huh!then my little thespian morgan in annie finally i get to see a show instead of a soccer game not that i minded a soccer game but change is good.then my wonderful weekend away for estrogen infusion and scrapbooking with my sassy scrapper sb group.and last but not least..the twins turn 17! in other news my neice meg gets married in two weeks,justin is in indiana on tour with forever the sickest kids,and our cruise is coming yippee...now back to facebook...

oh yea justin is on tour all over

lots of random winter photos..justin on tour with his new girl jewelia..she likes taking pictures which really works for me!guy with his crazy warm hat,guy with is ex but our still much loved sammy p(long story)ice skating yes i said ice skating on a lake in nj, and 4 of my boys with gary gartling on new years. so far so good.

goodbye 2008, hello 2009

so this year if God continues to bless me in this life,

i will travel somewhere new.

i will remain cancer free(God willing)

i will keep finding new ways to connect with my children

i will re do another room (and hopefully our deck)

i will live more in the moment

i will watch my neice get married

i will get more comfortable getting in and out of NYC

 i will keep control of my irish temper, but i will not beg for forgivenenss more than once

i will try to be a better friend.

i will excercise regularily

maybe i will loose some weight.

I hope to see Justin find success

I hope to see Guy Roberts heart to heal

I hope tyler finds his passion

I hope austin stays true to his heart.

i hope Morgan always find joys in small treasures.

I pray to find my spiritual heart again and to not despair.